glamour shots that made me feel like a monster

Kristina's always got something fun going on over at her blog. Today she's invited people to post their glamour shots. Since I'm always up for a chance to prove to people that I don't look like a male hobo everyday, I've decided to play along.

I have no idea where the actual CD is with all the pictures on it, so I had to take pictures of the little book that they made for us.

When the hairstylist was getting me ready for the first set of pictures she just stared at me at first, like she didn't know how she was going to make me decent looking.

Then she got an idea, she stepped over to the closet and pulled out a wedding beanie.




I thought that was kind of weird, but didn't think much of it.
Then for the next wardrobe and hair change the stylist stared at me again and started brainstorming.
Then she opened up her drawer and clipped on some fake bangs.



For the next few shots she had to consult with the head stylist. She brought her over and they both just stared at me. I heard one of them say, "Man her forehead is just so freaking big!"
They thought I didn't understand, did I mention this was in China? It was.
So that explained the beanie and the bangs, they were trying to cover up my monster forehead, but they were running out of ideas.
The head stylist took some hair way on the back of my head and pulled it up to cross over my forehead.





For the last session she just didn't care anymore, she pulled all my hair back and stuck a necklace on top of my head.



It was hard to smile.

kjanboiwub

eemurjancy room I took Meici to
her mouth grows rash all over
doctor says
you need medisin liddel gril
meici transform-
now Jackie Chan
punch kick scream
Bam
pow
nurses put meici in strait jaket
no working
just spit out medisin
doctor says 2 more opshuns
1. very hurting injections
2. cream stuff rubby rubby
me thinks bad girl deservs lots pain
doctor says no no lets try oinkment
oh well
Meici slowly getting butter
me am sleepy
no pictures
too yucky
lots o'puss

Bit O' Honey

This morning I asked Meici what she wanted for breakfast and she said, "SUNSHINE!"


I haven't been feeling well lately. I'm nauseous, tired and dizzy and I think I've been hallucinating, or maybe there really is a shark living in the toilet and a troll doll throwing markers at Evan.


My family are members of the Chinese Ward. We tell people we attend this ward because my husband is Chinese and it's a great way for him to stay in touch with his culture and language and be able to hear the gospel in his own tongue. But I think the real reason he likes the Chinese ward is because of the potlucks and the dragons.



Last Saturday Z and I volunteered at a soup kitchen, along with some other members of our ward.
Here we are, a bunch of Chinese people, eager and ready to serve the homeless.



I think when people started coming in and lining up they got really excited because they thought, from the looks of us, that they were getting chow mein, orange chicken, and mushu pork, or at least some fortune cookies.
Too bad it was just some bologna sandwiches. (I had to sing the entire oscar mayer wiener song to remember how to spell "bologna")

So what's with all the service stuff going on lately? Well, I have a new motto I've been trying to live by: What have I done today to deserve an extreme makeover home edition?

Meici was marching around the house today singing "I looked out the window and what did I see? Spongebob Squarepants, Spongebob Squarepants, SpongeBOB, SquarePANTS!!!"

It's 3:00 in the morning, and Z should be getting home from work pretty soon, he had to work the super late shift today. I'm staying up and waiting for him so I can kiss him good night and point out the dirty dishes he left on the table.

The other day Evan said to me, "Hey beautiful girl, have you seen my socks?"
If turning five means he just gets sweeter and sweeter, then I don't mind him growing up so fast.

Pho-tag

Thanks for all the birthday wishes! I really did have a fantastic birthday, er... three and a half months ago.

Today's post is a picture tag from my new friend, AZLarson.
Here are the rules:
1. Open your first photo folder
2. Scroll to the 10th photo.
3. Post the photo & the story behind it.
4. Tag 5 or more people.




Here it is, me playing outside with my little brother, my little daughter and some neighbor kids.
I played night games with these kids practically everyday for two months while I was living with my parents. Sometimes these kids would come over and ask if I could come out and play, instead of my little brother. It was so much fun, I felt like a kid again, my dad even bought me a jump rope.
The parents of these kids were a little concerned that I, a grown-up with kids of her own, was spending time outside playing with their kids. And then Z came back from China and he would join us outside playing kick-the-can, hide-and-seek, Charlie-Charlie Butcher boy, Ghost in the Graveyard, and Capture the Flag. That made the parents really suspicious, now there were two grown adults outside playing with their kids. I was kind of offended that they were so worried, I mean it's ME, I'm awesome, and would never hurt any kid. I've had kids spit on me, back when I worked at a daycare, and all I did was say "Oh GROSS!"

Anyway, I guess I understand their concern, they knew my parents, but didn't really know me. And I guess it didn't help that during our water balloon fight, Z threw a couple balloons too hard and made some of the kids cry.
How would you react if your kids were spending time with a 20-something year old couple?

Yeah, now that I think of it, it is a little weird.
It shouldn't be though!
Stupid corrupt society we live in, can't even say, "here I come, ready or not!" or "olly olly oxen free" without getting looked at fishy.


Now I tag all the homeless mommies in SLC because they probably don't get tagged very often. But they will be getting some very nice Mother's Day gift bags thanks to all your help.
But I still don't have enough to get me into that dress, but don't worry there's still a whole month left to try.

Crappy Birthday to Me!

I hate sharing a birthday with April Fool!

Nobody ever believes it's my birthday, and the people that do know it's my birthday always give me crappy presents. One year I got a wet rag, an empty box, and season 2 of Alf on DVD. And people think this is okay because hey it's April Fools Day anything goes.
I hate people!
If I don't get the new George Foreman USB igrill

or some Squeeze Bacon


this year I'm tearing up my birth certificate, which will make me disintegrate because it will mean I've never been born.